There’s really only one valid reason
to get out of bed early on summer weekends, and that’s to hit the garage sale
circuit. In the past I’ve been rather diligent about it (as long as the
preceding evening didn’t involve too much in the way of booze or boys, or that
tricky combination of both), and as Summer 2005 looms I’m slowly getting back
in the swing of things.

Last year, during my travels
throughout this lovely county, I made some observations about what people might
do to make their garage sale experiences more fun and profitable. But keep in
mind that I’ve never actually had a garage sale of my own. I think strangers
perusing my belongings and then rejecting them would do very little for my
self-esteem.

If
you’re having a garage sale:

•
Newspaper notices are great if you have rare or otherwise exciting stuff you
want to let people know about, but well-placed signs work just as well.

• Try to keep your sale sign from
looking like the Declaration of Independence. Date, address, and time are all
the information needed.

• Even better? Zipping around the
morning of your sale and posting signage with just the word “Sale” and an
arrow, hopefully pointing in the correct direction. And balloons are always
nice.

• Convince a few neighbors that it’s
time to part with some of their junk, too. There’s nothing that gets the heart
of a bargain hunter racing quite like a little cluster of sales on one street.

• Be reasonable with your pricing,
but don’t let anyone bully you into lowering a price that you’re hell-bent on
getting. There’s always eBay.

• Put a price on all the items you
wish to sell. And if someone asks how much something costs, don’t even think
about saying, “I don’t know. What do you want to pay for it?” I’ll save you the
suspense: We want to pay nothing. So either name a sum or fork it over.

• Prepare for bad weather. This is,
after all, Rochester.

• Spend a couple of minutes taking
your signs down after the sale. You will be so loved.

If
you’re attending a garage sale:

•
Don’t show up before the designated time of the sale. Yeah, some people might
get there before you, but everyone hates them.

• Make a concerted effort to park
courteously. Traffic still needs to get up and down the street even though you
just spotted a green Furby.

• Be respectful of your host’s
merchandise. Fold something up if you unfolded it, and return it to its
packaging if you dragged it out. And don’t mock their stuff in front of them
— granted, they don’t want it either, but at one time that magic defrosting
tray probably seemed like a good idea.

• Feel free to haggle, but don’t get
too greedy or insulting about it.

• Try to have small bills and change
on you for payment. The only people who appreciate a $50 bill shoved in their
face at 9 a.m. operate outside the law.

And anyone interested in the art of
the deal should set aside July 30 and 31. That’s the weekend of the annual New
York State Route 90 50-Mile-Long Garage Sale, which stretches from Montezuma to
Homer. For more information, visit www.cayuganet.org/route90/shopping.html

This article appears in Jun 15-21, 2005.