In my 20s and early 30s, I moved roughly every 12-18 months. The reasons varied from career changes and city relocations to grad school and relationship status; but it became sort of a running joke with my friends and family. Once I hit a year somewhere, wasn’t it time to move on? (Needless to say, I started hiring movers rather than bribing loved ones with pizza and beer.)
Five years ago, I sold my little house flip in Brighton and toured a downtown apartment via video during the pandemic. I moved in without seeing another soul in the hallways and spent the quiet months of 2020 decorating and building furniture. I’ve stayed put ever since — maybe because it’s easier than moving, or maybe because I love the feeling of somewhere to land at the end of a long day. “In my own little corner, in my own little chair, I can be whatever I want to be,” as Julie Andrews sings in Rodgers + Hammerstein’s “Cinderella.”
But I also haven’t found anywhere — or anyone — else that feels like home. The closest I got was this past July, when a condo in an old school went on the market (those who read my weekly newsletter may remember my chagrin at the final sale price soaring $100K over asking).
‘Home’ really is a funny word. Is it a place? When my parents sold my childhood home, I felt a bit unmoored, even though I was happy they could have a fresh start. When I sold the first house I purchased and a friend made it their home, I walked through the doors feeling as though I were entering the space for the first time.
Editing the October issue has solidified my belief that home is a state of mind; a state of being. A person’s arms around us. A voice on the phone, even if it’s miles away. A good meal around a table full of people we love. A city where we found ourselves. And perhaps, a longing for an even greater destination beyond this life.
Being a person in the world isn’t always easy, but our “village” is what gets us through while we are here.
At the end of the day, we are all just walking each other home.
L
SAVE THE DATE
For us Rochesterians, home isn’t just where the heart is, it’s where the art is — and there’s a lot of it here in the Flower City. Over the last two months, we asked you to write in your nominations for the Best Of Rochester 2025 awards, and on October 1, final voting began for the top nominees in each category. Vote here through November 28, and SAVE THE DATE: winners will be announced at our Best Of Awards Party on Saturday, January 3 at Anthology.
