The XX Files

I
confess to feeling more than just a little freaked out by all these stories
lately about violence against women. I’m not alone; a recent poll shows that
the top priority of women, over abortion and equal pay, is finding a solution
to domestic violence.

            When they’re not abducting or
raping, men seem to be either burning down the house while the family sleeps or
killing their pregnant partners and tossing their bodies into the woods or into
the sea; or shooting their wives in front of the children.

            In order to get a grip on myself, to
get a little distance, I decided to learn more about violence against women.
Statistics. Facts. The Big Picture.

            Bad idea. Now I’m even more depressed.

Depressing
statistic #1: The number-one cause of death of pregnant women is murder,
according to three recent studies.

            Last month police issued a forensic
sketch of a seven-month-pregnant woman who was found dead in Wayne County last
summer. Not only do they lack a suspect, they don’t know who the dead woman is.
She was too badly decomposed to identify when they found her, nude, wrapped in
a shower curtain deep in the woods.

Depressing
statistic #2: On average, more than three women are murdered
by their husbands or boyfriends in this country every day, according to the
Family Violence Prevention Fund.

            Tacoma Police Chief David Brame
murdered his estranged wife Crystal and then killed himself recently while
their kids watched. This tragedy was avoidable. The day before, Brame, who had
a history of abuse, publicly made threatening statements about his wife, and
his cronies closed ranks and refused to disarm him.

Depressing
statistic # 3: A full third of women in the United States will be raped or
beaten by an intimate partner at least once, according to the Centers for
Disease Control. This statistic doesn’t take attacks by strangers into account.

            Local rape rates are supposedly down
this year, but I’m not buying it. First, national rape statistics are up. And
second, since the crime goes unreported more than half the time, no rape stats
can be trusted.

All this bad news about violence
against women has prompted me and some of my friends to revisit our own rape
and sexual-abuse stories. Many of the women I know have experienced sexual
violence, usually at the hands of a friend or lover. Surprised? You shouldn’t
be.

Depressing
statistic #4: Studies of 8th and 9th graders show 25 percent of them have
been victims of nonsexual dating violence and 8 percent have been victims of
sexual dating violence, according to the CDC.

But, even as
the news and
my friends’ disturbing stories accumulate in my mind, I find a tiny ray of hope
in all the groups working to combat rape and abuse. Huge strides have been made
in awareness and treatment since domestic abuse laws were passed in the 1990s.
But we need to go further.

Reassuring
item #1: The Rochester chapter of the National Council of Jewish Women is planning to
bring a play about date rape called The
Yellow Dress to area high schools next fall.

            The play is a production of Deana’s
Fund, a Massachusetts foundation established by Deana Brisbois’ family after
she died under suspicious circumstances. Brisbois’ story is all too common.
First her boyfriend isolated her from her friends and family. Then he started a
cycle of violent fights followed by flowers and apologies. Finally, the abuse
culminated in a terrible fight that may have contributed to her death in a car
accident.

            “Violence against women starts with
violence against girls,” says NCJW outgoing-president Arlene Schenker. She
stresses that teens, who often know less about domestic violence than their
mothers, can learn a lot from the play, which “highlights some danger signs in
a soon-to-be-abusive relationship.”

Reassuring
item #2: Alternatives to Battered Women runs a vigorous education program that reaches
out to schools, religious groups, and community centers.

            An educational flyer from a domestic
abuse group like ABW helped my friend in North Carolina get out of a bad
relationship in college. “He would shake me and push me,” she says, “but
because he never actually punched me, I didn’t realize it was abuse. I just
thought he had a bad temper.”

            “It’s important for people to call
for information,” ABW executive director Catherine Mazzotta says. “Those in the
[abusive] situation need know they are not alone.”

Reassuring
item #3: Governor
George Pataki is calling for increased DNA testing of convicted criminals and
abolishing statutes of limitations for violent crimes.

            Both these moves should help
bring more felons to justice. The five-year statute of limitations on
first-degree rape — and other Class B felonies like first-degree robbery and
assault — is ridiculous and outdated. It’s not uncommon for new evidence —
usually DNA — to crop up years later, often too late to help the victim
prosecute the attacker.

            Pataki wants to increase DNA testing
to include all convicted criminals; currently only some felons are tested. The
New York State DNA Databank is viewed as a big success, having just reached its
1000th match between DNA collected from a convicted felon and evidence from an
unsolved crime scene.

Reassuring
item #4: Nearly three-quarters of the matches on the NYS DNA Databank were for sexual assault
cases, according to the governor’s June 4 press release.

            The majority of these were felons
who had their DNA collected earlier when they were convicted of other violent crimes. This means that
burglary suspects could also be wanted for rape and vice versa.

As depressing
as the state of violence against women still is, I’m trying to feel
upbeat about things. After all, I’ve survived my assaults.

            Unlike Patricia Scoville, I can
still make a difference. I can still support ABW. I can still vote. She can’t.

            Scoville, a Canandaigua native, was
brutally raped and murdered 11 years ago when she was out for a bike ride in
Stowe, Vermont. Instead of planning for her 40th birthday, which would have
been last month, her parents, David and Ann Scoville, were working with
Governor Pataki to expand the national DNA databank. Patricia’s case has never
been solved.

This article appears in Jul 2-8, 2003.